Thee Ladyboner of All Ladyboners

First of all, how DARE I almost forget to do a post celebrating THEE day of birth of THEE icon of masculine perfection. The Ultimate of Ultimates… The LADYBONER of ALL LADYBONERS…

STAMOS

STAMOSSS

JOHN STAMOS AKA JOHN STAYMOIST! MY BELOVED GRECIAN HUNK!

So let’s rewind and let me break it down for you. Back in the day, when I was just a wee lil’ thang, watching Full House on TGIF, of course I was in love with Uncle Jesse! Eyes like the Caribbean Sea…the body of a Greek god…the bad boy rebelliousness yet underneath lay a heart of mutha fuckin’ gold…the HAIR. HAVE MERCY! It wasn’t until a particular episode of MTV’s House of Style where Dave Navarro had a framed picture of John Stamos surrounded by candles and feather boas that CAUGHT ON FIRE (Hilarious I DIE too bad the clip is nowhere to be found) did my brother and I decide we had to start building an altar dedicated to His Royal Stamosness.

First, stickers were made to make the whole world moist.

Windy City Roll Call

From west coast…

outside of spaceland

To east coast…

<NewYork1 078

He was spread far and wide, in the States and overseas, and finally to Uncle Jesse’s place of origin.

yes.

Slowly the pieces of the puzzle for the Church of Stamos started to come together…including this actual recently acquired puzzle which has NOT been opened yet. I am saving that for a very special occasion.

DSC02103

Is that the Rockin’ Uncle Jesse Doll? ..and another Jesse’s family doll set behind it…complete with the twins?!!

This is a clip from a movie he did with VANITY called Never Too Young to Die. I seriously can’t watch this too much because well, you’ll see.

clip courtesy of TNUC

BTW, I JUST found out he has a Twitter so basically F U to anyone who knew this and didn’t tell me!! And what is with this tweet?? John (may I call you John :* )- did you ever get the stickers I sent to you via Perez Hilton in 2006?! OR WAS THAT A RUSE, PEREZ?!?

Jesse and The Rippers…I remember finding this video in 2005 and watching it over and OVER.

Sweet Dreams and Best Birthday Wishes Mr. Stamos (again, may I call you John or do you prefer HUNK OF MY DREAMS??)…it is my DESIRE TO MEET YOU. We can duet!! I promise I am a well-adjusted and bright young lady…who just owns a doll in your likeness….that’s ALL.

xoxo,

17 comments

1 desboobs { 08.19.09 at 9:35 pm }

Oh god that man is seriously a fucking god.

2 Erin { 08.19.09 at 9:43 pm }

Did you ever see this amazing interview he gave on Australian daytime TV?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNVRlznrIBI
My heart and loins grew even fonder!

3 melis { 08.19.09 at 10:23 pm }

okay, now I have me a ladyboner from that soft porn video he did!! WHAT??!!?? how come i’ve never seen that or knew about that shit!?! crazy!! and OMG that forever video i TOTALLY remember that!! HAHAHA! so cheese with the nicky and alex and the big white bed and the just like a prayer church!! LOL! ah man, TGIF FULL HOUSE MEMORIES!! have merrrrcy! i’m glad he still has “the hair” lol. still makin’ em moist since ’87! ;p i can’t believe he’s still single!!!

4 mary { 08.19.09 at 10:37 pm }

That’s awesome that you made those stickers and posted them across the country. LOVE.

I love how he keeps going into the bungalow to get food to feed his horn.

5 Ms Constantine { 08.20.09 at 12:56 am }

Those first two pics! Swoon!

I’ve loved him since I was a little girl watching Full House. He was one of my first crushes, along with Rider Strong from Boy Meets World.

6 The Friendinator { 08.20.09 at 1:05 am }

How is that Kimmy Gibler probably hung out with him 5 days a week and sniffing his panties is still just a distant dream for you? How did nature so oh-so-wrongly reverse life-paths like that?

7 Betsey J { 08.20.09 at 5:40 am }

omgggg.
did you see that lifetime movie he did..
“the two mr.kissels”
he was so damn hot in it.

8 Fajr | Stylish Thought { 08.20.09 at 5:57 am }

John Staymoist! I damn near died reading this! Uncle Jesse was my boyfriend in my head and I wanted to scratch Rebecca’s eyes out for taking my man.

9 Carly { 08.20.09 at 11:58 am }

Truly an amazing post. Thanks to you I am now following John Stamos on Twitter. I had no idea he was there!

10 Mickay { 08.20.09 at 1:48 pm }

i would “straighten” up a bit for the Stamos. he is fiiiine.

11 Emine { 08.20.09 at 1:49 pm }

LOL @I love how he keeps going into the bungalow to get food to feed his horn.

12 Shaun { 08.20.09 at 4:08 pm }

LOVIN’ IT & LOVIN’ YOU!

I will always treasure going to see the House, where it all began.

13 sarah von { 08.21.09 at 10:30 am }

Uncle Jessie, you will always have a special place in my heart (aka bed)

14 TNUC { 08.22.09 at 12:43 pm }

STAMOS, ICONIC!

15 bazooka joe { 08.27.09 at 10:39 am }

Can I tell you how much I love your blog more and more each day?? First the Chola Style Guide and now this!!! HAVE MERCY!!!!!

16 amanda { 08.27.09 at 1:07 pm }

Going to see him in Bye Bye Birdie in NY this fall!

17 mouf.peace { 08.28.09 at 5:52 pm }

lmao john stay moist, i can’t take it i can’t!

Leave a Comment

CommentLuv badge