here's lookin' at chu kid

Hello cryptid lovers! MEETING IN SESSION. Okay kids, I am a big nerd for cryptozoology of every kind: legendary creatures, undiscovered oceanic animals…I love them all, especially the furry little lobster of 2006. Where is my garlic butter?

Anyway, I find it an amusing coincidence that lately the news has been filled with strange creature sightings week after week. I have also noticed in the recent few years there seems to be more reports of giant squid and other large oceanic animal sightings. This sort of thing personally freaks me out because of a certain apocalyptic giant octopus dream I had in 1998, which some of you know I am obsessed with. MAWR! Back to recent events, sadly, the “Montauk Monster” was fake, but what about its creepy comrades that have been making waves across computer screens in the past week?

This video of the Chupacabra sighting in Texas shows what looks like a dog running from the camera. When it turns its head to the left, you can make out what seems to be a long snout. CHUPACABRA? Or just a mangy mutt?

And then there’s the Bigfoot that a couple of dudes in Georgia found. Supposedly they have this homeboy kicking it in a freezer waiting for an autopsy. I don’t know about all that. Bigfoot is like the Holy Grail in Cryptozoology. It’s probably someone’s old Harry and the Hendersons Halloweeners costume. Aww.

And of course we have to ask, why does it seem that more and more people are obsessing over mythical creature sightings moreso than ever before? Were these things actually always there and the somewhat sudden major interest in them is only highlighted because of our expedited access to information? Or is it just that in these modern times we want escapism more than ever to help us deal with all of the lame shit going on in the world? F U gas prices, let’s go ride a unicorn!

Am I trying to get too deep for a Friday? Let us go back to talking about boners and shoes.

Your hot cup of nerd stew,


to get your monster-hunting weekend rockin’: Bobby “Boris” Pickett – “Monster Mash”