Dress from Stop Staring, Betsey Johnson Polly heels.

One time I wore this dress going to Starbucks and some sexy manz gave me a double take, then I gave him a double take and I noticed he had a clerical collar! What is this Marie, THE THORN BIRDS??? IN MY DREAMS…

Christina Aguilera’s AMAZING SHOE CLOSET/LIBRARY!!!! AHHHHH!!! Sidebar, why am I on some crazy Christina Aguilera kick lately? Am I already waxing my nostalgic legs for the early 00′s?

#1. I’ve been watching this for the past week. #2. Now I want to get dirrty. #3. Now I am excited about this COUNTDOWN. What’s happening to me? I won’t fight it though. I’m just going to make an Xtina aerobics megamix! For myself to enjoy…

Mariah Carey’s closet. So LARGE and in charge I had to chop the photo in half. Mariah is SO CRAY now isn’t she? I mean she was already going cuckoolicious a few years ago when she was pushing that ice cream truck on TRL. I’m scared because I do have a soft spot for Mariah Carey you know. I don’t want her to have a big break (break) down. (Fave song ft BONE THUGS)

You better believe I’d post KIMORA on here!!!

You’ve probably seen Anna Sui’s amazing hidden walk-in closet inspired by The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe! My DREAM since childhood is to have a house filled with secret passageways… Lemme just get my futon, Anna. I’ll be catching some zzz’s in your closet. Hope you have some of your eyeliner in there for me to use in the morning.

I couldn’t find a picture of Betsey Johnson’s actual closet, only those sweet pics of her pink apartment, but during my lurks I remembered she was supposed to debut a home collection a few years ago with bedding but it never came out. What a bummer! Where are these samples? Look at what we could have been sleeping on! Man I’m such a whore for some floral.

Last but never least, a little bit of IMELDA!!!

I’m sure by now your 24 hour special event reminder for my birthday has gone off on your alarm clocks, Microsoft Outlook calendars, phones and pagers. Tomorrow is a time of celebration for us all, not only my October 16 birthday compadres such as Angela Lansbury, Oscar Wilde, Nico, Flea and Hobie from Baywatch, …it is also an excuse to pour yourself a STIFF ONE and listen to some sweet slow jamz just knowing that I am forever your ride or die chick.

My birthday is also a time for me to dream of what my future can hold. Even in shopping form. So I compiled a birthday wish list!

ON MY FINGAS BUT NEVER ON MY TOEZ: I like wearing a lot of rings so of course I’m going to want to add to my collection. These are all from Vivienne Westwood, Han Cholo, and Noir. I want more brooches too! In my dream world I’d have this Vivienne Westwood one.

HAND IN GLOVE THE SUN SHINES OUTTA MY BEHIND: Gotta get my glove game on. In NY I spotted these pink and black gloves at Patricia Field which would be perfect for “driving gloves” when I’m ridin’ dirty down the 101. I’d also love any of these Mod Cloth gloves so I can be classy when I feel you up like the grams on Sixteen Candles.

I WANNA VOMIT SEQUINS: I wanna sparkle and shine ’til the end of time. Give me these Betsey Johnson sequined pedal pushers and this crazy coat!

NOTHIN’ AS BOLD AS BOWNERS N’ GOLD: Even though grey is not one of my favorite colors, for some reason I am digging this purse from my #1 favorite Betsey Johnson. I think… WHOMIKIDDING of course it’s the gold touches that catch my eye. That and the bow. Gawd I’m so predictable. ::eyeroll:

PANTYHOSE IN DIFFERENT AREA CODES: I need some new backseam pantyhose to go with some sexy heels I just bought. These American Apparel ones will do!

BOOTS MEANS PU**Y IN ARMENIAN: My favorite gold cowboy bootz are giving up on me you guys. I got them for $10 at this random store in the mall years ago as a “joke”. As I always say…after some time, jokes for me usually “turn real.” So now I want some new gold ones AND of course some red ones. In the meantime, I will run these gold cowboy boots into the ground until the soles start talking and the heel breaks off. I haven’t even gotten lucky in these gold cowboy boots yet! ::raises eyebrows and remembers something m’lord::

POLLY WANNA CRACKER: I am crazy about my Betsey Johnson Pollys! I wanted these gold ones for this past summer but never got them. They are STILL #1 on my list. Patricia Field makes these.

NAUTICAL GIRLS NEED LOVE TOO: Sailor style never gets old for me. I adore this Stop Staring dress!

WEDNESDAY ADDAMS GOT NUTHIN’ ON ME: Since it’s autumn, I am going back to my Satan’s School for Girls ways (not like I ever left) but that means dressing like an amish whore! Love this dress from Mod Cloth.

PANTS ARE FOR SUCKERS (JK I LOVE U): American Apparel makes these really cute high-waist skirts and I want to add more to my collection. I already own black of course.

C’MON KITTY LIGHT MY FIRE: Hello Kitty bedazzled lighter! Need I say more?

ONCE I READ THAT COFFEE DRINKERS ARE BETTER IN THE SACK: I just went the week without coffee. WTF, but sometimes I have to slow my roll. I drank green tea instead, which was nice, HOWEVER, baby girl needs some caffeine! Last night I was so tired my eyes were closed and I was talking nonsense. I’m sorry Shaun. Coffee Bean I love you. I’ll take Starbucks too.

DREAMING OF YOU TONIGHT: I CAN’T BREATHE!! I NEED THIS SELENA BLANKET!!! Winter nights are coming…I’m going to be cold. Only two things can warm my young, nubile, bod up..a sexy menz and this SELENAS BLANKET!!! I’ll take both if you got em. Bidi Bidi BOMB.com.

HAVE MERCY ON ME: Lastly…my ultimate b-day wish..for THEE JOHN STAMOS, THEE LADYBONER OF MY LIFE TO SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME ON TWITTER. Of course I’d love for him to sing to me wearing Clark Kent glasses and holding a Grey Goose and tonic…but I’ll take a TWITTER SHOUTOUT. Someone make my dreams come true. Just this once.

I LOVE YOU ALL!!!

Hallow sexies! I have just returned from a weekend geta-RAGE with my girls in San Francisco! Lots of booze, boos, bowners, boobs…and singing. Lots and lots of singing! From serenading a cab driver The Little Mermaid soundtrack songs (obviously I am obsessed if you’ve seen the Eyeliner tutorial video) to stairwell acappella versions of 90′s R&B jams…BEAUTIFUL! I swear these girls are the SF version of my bffs in SoCal. That’s deep bo. It’s fucking bananas. KISMET I’m tellin’ you. LOVIN U I’m telling you even more.

Star! My wifeyboo and hostess! Absolutely beautiful and brilliant. Always a pleasure.

Me, Star, Kristen and Melinda lounging at the Kink party.

Care for a splash of JEAN NATE??

I die for Kristen’s Hilary Banks-inspired outfit. WHY YOU KILL ME BO

Mary Van Note and I finally got to meet IN THE FLESH! I love her so much. Classy, sweet, stylish and hilar! (I keep watching this and dying) We even share the same exact middle name…which is really weird. Excuse me while I continue to trip on this shit again and again sober and three days later but I’ve never met another Madeline especially one with it as their same middle name and a variation of the same first name! Are we twins in a parallel dimensh? Sisters from another mister? Or perhaps we were SISTERS together in the NUN-sense in a past life. Sister Act!? Okay I am just going off on a crazy catholick tangent but I know you feel me. If you missed the interview I did with her, please read here!

I heart Will!

M&M get rowdy dowdy

Bandmates!

I just got this cute leopard faux fur jacket from Forevs Veintiunos and it was so hot in SF I thought I would not be able to wear it! It matched my Betsey Johnson luggage perfectly.

I love channeling a little Fran Dresch.  A few years ago my New Years resolution was to dress like The Nanny. Shall I try again? Wide headbands? Put these baby bangs on Karate Kid lockdown and put my fo’ on display?? Watchu think?

Speaking of, during a lil Googs, I found this amazing fashion blog about The Nanny. BRILLIANT!

So as I promised, here’s a follow-up to the New Jack Swing mix. Nothing beats some good 90′s R&B slow jams to get the HORN rollin’. And as much as I love me some Pussy Monster, Lil’ Wayne’s enthralling lyrics do not induce the same type of chest-heaving, lip-smacking, rice-cooking arousal as the beginning of Keith Sweat’s “NOBODY!” ::faints::. As you can see I am making you SWEAT from the beginning to the end of this mix. Hope you all like it! Be careful…it may cause boner swells and snail trails.

Download 90′s HORN MIX

Forever Your Tenderoni,

Bettie Page Heaven Bound, an art show paying tribute to the life of Bettie Page, and curated by Lenora Claire, opened this past Saturday at the World of Wonder gallery. As you can imagine, the girls and I had the most glamorous slash craziest time ever which is always expected at Lenora’s events.

The ladies and I with Dita Von Teese and Selene Luna!

Nikki, Nicki, Reyna and I with the legendary Olivia!

A couple of Olivia’s pieces

Polite in Public had a spanking machine in their photobooth. ME GUSTA! Notice how my face is the least surprised and affected…

Then the amazing Bobby Trendy joined in on the fun…I know. I die. This is going to be my Christmas card everybody.

Let’s talk FASHION! This crazy gold spider on my head was actually made by me! I’ll be writing about it more in the next post.

• Gold Widow headpiece made by me
• vintage dress
• one silk glove with gold stacks
• black heart ring & leopard head ring
• black heart purse -H&M
• Betsey Johnson black glitter Polly heels

I also made an octopus one for Tiffany to wear. Looked good on her blonde ‘do! Here we are with the beautiful Lenora Claire.

Elvira as Bettie Page by Austin Young!

Reyna and I taking turns sitting with Bettie Page’s actual shoes!

Always nice to see Mr. Jason Savvy!

Here’s a wild little video Nicki took of me giving the lowdown of the show. The end is the best…crazy Micks.

In the meantime!

XOXO

Related posts:

+ Mad Crushin’ on Lenora Claire
+ Lenora Claire’s Birthday at Houdini Mansion
+ Unpleasant Dreams
+ Lenora Claire likes doNUTS
+ You Better Work

• dress- vintage
• assorted gold stacks
• steve madden wedges
• charlotte russe ring
• metropark glasses
• betsey johnson bag
• beijing market shopping bag

Just a quick outfit post for now from a kickback weekend spent doing some crafting, organizing, shopping and watching LIFETIME ORIGINAL MOVIES. I am totally going to start Netflixing Roswell soon because of that. MISS U.
Below are some of my favorite oldies for you to enjoy until I can get some more posts out.

+ Dusty Springfield – I Only Want To Be With You
+ Linda Scott – I’ve Told Every Little Star
+ The McGuire Sisters – Sincerely

This news is a couple weeks old but we gonna chat about it anyway since you know I love me some crazy Betsey Johnson. Supposedly Miss J is going to do a collab with a retailer sometime in the fall. My guess is the obvious Target and not H&M. I’m always stoked on Betsey, but I do hope she brings it to the table for this one. The last couple of designer collections at Target have been… bleh. GIMME SOME FLAVOR MOMMA. However, I’ve been having mad luck at her outlet sales in the past couple of months and found two dresses for New Year’s for only 60 BONES = BUY ONE GET ONE FREE. Woo! Yes, I know, this betch should not be shopping and had to forgo a pedicure because of it, but this shit was too cute to pass up:

Peep that lil green and white stripe action. And my drunk on fire swirly face. @_@