I think I speak for a lot of us when I say I have as many mixed feelings about Jeffrey Campbell as I do about guys I have hatecrushes on. On one hand, I love the JC shoes that I own, and usually have a pair or two on my wish list. On the other hand, I get turned off when he does crazy shit like ripoff the iconic Ferragamo rainbow shoe and then has the audacity to sue Forever 21 for allegedly ripping him off! (Disclaimer: this b has purposely not shopped at F21 since early 2010 so don’t think I’m “on their side” or anything) But the most amusing thing about JC to me is the epic saga of their Lita, aka the shoe that just won’t quit. Does anyone know how many versions of the Lita have been put out since their inception? It has to be over a hundred by now. SO INSANE! I bet if you spill water on a Lita it will multiply like Gremlins. Whenever a new style comes out, I imagine our pal Jeff diving into piles of gold coins like Scrooge McDuck in the beginning of Ducktales. I have tons of Lita jokes, you guys. TONS! But whatever. Ladies Love Litas and you gotta give a little respect when someone’s hustle is that strong, right?
But now…YOU DONE DID ME DIRTY JEFF. You have taken my sacred memories of being curled up into a speaker while wearing pants made of Popples sheets at the San Bernadino Masterdome and stuffed them into the form of a $130 platform sneaker. Now look, you guys know I support the comebacks of quite a few 90′s trends. After all, I came of age during that time. It’s one of the many reasons why I am so amazing and brilliant today, I’m sure. But how dare you with these shoes, Jeffrey! Yes, it was Prada that brought the stacks back, which you also quickly banked on (gawd your hustle is so strong, bb!) At least let’s pay our respects to the club kids who made their own stacked sneakers. I knew some guys back then who could rip the asses of any smug DIY asshole these days. Then there were the clueless kids who tried building their own shoes using STYROFOAM, superglue and an orange marker. That wasn’t me btw. I had purple platform Skechers with strawberry laces myself. May I also tell you about an anonymous pal whose aunt made potted plants out of her old stacked shoes? These are the kinds of intense memories that you are stirring up for me and my friends, Jeff. I just don’t know how to feel anymore. Let’s go to my bff whose reaction was presented to me this morning when I signed back on to iChat:
I see Jeff also made his own version of Ginger Spice’s Union Jack boots which you can buy for a mere two hundo bones!!!! You guys know you could probably just get these boots at any of the stripper stores on Hollywood Boulevard right? Sigh. Jeff, I find you vainglorious and I find you rude. Sadly, you still turn my hooves on and I know I’m going to want more of you in the future even though I hate you with the fire of a thousand suns! My question undoubtedly is this: Will the shoe whores and fashion bloggers of the world ever turn their backs on Jeff Campbell? And if so, will hoards of fashionistas gather in the streets to burn their collections of Litas? For now, I don’t see that happening. You’re a lucky man. You fucked with Judy’s rainbow shoes and you STILL got almost every Tumblr’s pussy wet with your new Cosmic Litas. Plus, there are plenty of other shoe trends from the 90′s that need to be remade and sold for thrice their original value…
DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT JEFF. However, I do have a new style of Lita you might want to consider though….
July 28, 2011 21 Comments
♥ Bjork tee from Vespertine tour//vintage skirt from Fairfax flea (kinda obsessed with it lately)//shoes from Amiclub.com/SLEEPING LOHAN bag printed by Vistaprint.com ♥
HERE SHE IS
You voted and I chose….THIS BEAUT to be my new bag. Let’s take a look at A Day In The Life Of Sleeping Lohan…
Taking a rest in the men’s bathroom at Starbucks
Enjoying a nice vegan lunch…
As you can see it makes for many interesting photo opportunities. This joke may never get old to me you guys, just a warning. I feel like we all LOVE this photo because we have ALL been like this at some point (sleeping/with mouth open/in a car/ hopefully in the backseat or passenger side) so obviously we relate to her in this very HUMAN moment.
Also, let me just say that as much of a LAWLLER this bag is, it’s also surprisingly good quality! STURDY AND STRONG JUST LIKE LOHAN’S SPIRIT! And it looks like they are doing the FREE TOTES AGAIN! I think it’s today only so you best get up on dat sistas and brosas! Oh great, NOW which one should I get?? Someone should probably get the pic of her infamous manicure on a bag next so we can be twinzies.
July 19, 2011 10 Comments
AHH YOU GUYS I AM SO SUNBURNED! And I have crazy tan lines on my cleav! That’s what I get for wanting to be DARQUE AS NIGHT all the time!! Hope you guys had a good fourth too!
July 5, 2011 11 Comments
When you are a Low Maintenance Girl That Looks High Maintenance like myself (more on that later) you have to try some new things once in awhile, even though they will annoyingly cause your beauty routine to require more time. I thought this outfit called for a hairstyle that was opposite of my usual cascading 70′s Cher locks (plus it was hot out and I didn’t want to put it in a lazy ponytail) so I decided to finally try what The Others call “Heidi braids” or “Milkmaid braids.” Of course I had my hesitations. Could I, Marie Madeline Lodi, with my natural Pocahontas-like weave pull off a hairstyle that is more commonly seen adorning the crowns of delicate girltypes such as those found in the pages of Lula? I really wasn’t sold on the idea, but once I came across photos of my two favorites Salma Hayek and Penelope Cruz wearing them, I felt I was given the green light. So I lit a candle, prepared my tresses and imagined Javier Bardem guiding my hands braid after braid. After a surprisingly quick effort, I reached SUCCESS!
I look so innocent and freckly here, don’t I? I’m going to practice so the hair tie is better hidden next time. The cute plaid clip is from Cutie Dynamite!
The amazing collar is from Rococo Nouveau, my friend Kristen’s line of collarettes! This one is called the “Madeline” so naturally I love it even more! Keep your eyes peeled for an upcoming interview and giveaway from Rococo Nouveau!
I’m also wearing a new shade of red lipstick here! This one is Besame’s “Red Hot.” I usually only fux with MAC and Chanel but I want to branch out and experience some new reds. This one gets my TWO THUMBS UP.
Next time I will attempt to finally conquer Madonna’s Blonde Ambition ponytail. ARE YOU READY!?!? I’m going to have to prepare even more for that one, like soak my hair in virgin tears and play “Express Yourself” backwards.
June 30, 2011 15 Comments
Vista Print is giving away free custom print tote bags today. You can pay a little bit more to upload your own design. CLEARLY I WILL BE TAKING ADVANTAGE. I have tons of these kinds of totes since they are great for grocery shopping, thrifting and going to the flea market, carrying your lunch, etc. So which one of these iconic photos will I slap on my new gym tote??? Let us peruse the designs I came up with so far, shall we…?
Daddy and baby?
Mariah’s best role?
Tears of a clown?
No words. I just love this photo. Might be better for a heart-shaped locket though.
A photo of the tip jar I’d use if I had my own cafe?
This is just the first batch. I’m going to be doing this all day I’m sure. Maybe you will see the winning design in a future post. Sidebar: I kind of want to do Agent Lover totes. Should I ? Is that stu? It would’t be a corny all over LV print that says AL or anything, I swears. Hmmm…I shall come up with something cute and marinate on it.
Will you get a tote? What will you put on it?
June 29, 2011 15 Comments
Don’t worry, your ojos are not playing tricks on you. What you are seeing is not a mirage. Your favorite from the West Coast (DIS A-HOLE RIGHT HERE) and your favorite from the East Coast (WHITE LIGHTNING HERSELF!) finally met BANGS2BANGS!!!
This work of art you see here is a magical gif complete with supernatural floating trinkets made from a pic of Elizabeth and I shopping on Melrose. “We’re going to Melrose” (Amber from Clueless voice.) I think I’m going to be making more of these gifs so let me know if you have any requests. (Mariah, Staymoist, corn, etc. and etc.)
June 28, 2011 3 Comments
GREETINGS EVERYBUDDY. This is just a simple outfit post from last weekend when I met up with Aurora at the Fairfax flea! I wore my favorite oldie but goodie “by the pool dress” with a bolero jacket that belonged to my mom in the 70′s and my lemon Pollys. I need more things in this mint green color…it’s my FAVE. Belt is from I Heart Ronson and Cloven Hoof beetle wing earrings.
Aurora is wearing a thrifted Kimchi and Blue dress, boots from Buffalo Exchange and leftover flowers from her wedding in her hair!
WHO WANTS TO JOIN OUR 2 PERSON MARIAH CAREY SUPERFAN CLUB?
I saw this jacket from a distance and had to lurk it closer to puke. I can’t deal with anything made out of someone’s old jeans, YOU GUYS. I hate when people make tote bags and shit out of someone’s dirty old denim! WHYYYYY. NASTY. ::puh puh puh:: (that’s me spitting out of disgust)
P.S. SIDEBAR in case any of you missed Gala’s series on Body Pressure in Blogging, she asked bloggers and readers to contribute their thoughts and my two pesos can be read here! If you want to discuss more of that subject with me, feel free to in the comments! Perhaps I will write more about it later?
June 28, 2011 7 Comments
Sistadudes, can we finally talk about this IMPORTANT SUBJECT already? Brunch aka “I am too lazy and hungover to make it to breakfast,” is one of my favorite things in the whole world. I know it’s just a corny term you use to eat a late breakfast with your crew (usually the people you hung out with a few hours prior.) This way, you can keep the party going and extend the previous night’s binge-drinking under the guise of “fancy mom drinks” like mimosas and Bloody Mary’s. Don’t you need some of that el pelo del perro anyway?
Here are some Serious Brunch Rules I have made up for us to abide by, then break later:
- Brunch starts at 11am and ends at 3pm. Anytime you eat prior to 11am is considered breakfast and reserved for early-risers like grampas and churchpeople. Anytime after 3pm should just be switched to “Thai takeout” because if you are starting your Sunday that late you might as well stay in and Netflix all day in your pajamas, Lazy. (Sounds awesome though)
- Brunch is always on a weekend, usually after a wild night out. It can also be scheduled as a date to meet with out-of-town pals. You can’t brunch on a weekday so don’t even try to ask.
- Brunch foods can be either breakfast or lunch items BUT they must be decadent and/or greasy with various carbs and types of cheese. A side of fruit and oatmeal does not count as brunch, sorry.
- Brunch should ideally last at least two hours. Let’s be Epicurean for once and just eat, drink, and talk shit for a while. Life is too short to rush our special Brunchtimes with each other.
- There must be alcohol present at Brunch, obviously.
- Anytime you say you are “going to Brunch” you WILL sound like a big asshole. You might as well be taking tennis lessons at the country club afterwards with James Spader’s character from Pretty in Pink, Preppy (A.C. Slater voice.) But it’s okay because you’re going to Brunch so screw everyone else, right?
(Now please tell me your favorite places and foods to brunch at and upon so I can make a master Brunchbook that we will pass around underground like the assholes that we are.)
June 26, 2011 22 Comments
So let’s get real for a mome. I usually have this annual post ready for you in April and it’s already almost July! Honestly, I lagged on it because I thought you guys didn’t need my help no mo’. Three years ago when I first wrote this, we didn’t have many options when it came to cute repros of vintage style bathing suits, but now we have so many! So I just figured all of you would just go to Modcloth and find something there. THEN I realized I can’t be doing you dirty like this! Breaking this tradition of hunting for the cutest swimsuits for my sisters whilst listening to my favorite Sean Kingston pool jams?? I DON’T THINK SO. Especially because he needs our support more than ever this year since his horrible jet-ski accident! So glad you’re doing OK, SEAN. WATA GWAN! Anyway, so here we are. Let’s kick this off by talking about this year’s icon, who is no other than the silver screen’s own bathing beauty, Esther Williams.
Esther Williams aka the Million Dollar Mermaid, was the queen of the aquamusical. Her elaborate swimming scenes have always mesmerized a shy little girl who never even learned how to doggy paddle due to multiple ear surgeries as a child. THAT’S RIGHT EVERYONE I’M TALKING ‘BOUT ME. If I can somehow get over this crippling fear of putting my head underwater, I WILL reenact a Busby Berkeley synchronized swimming scene. But it won’t be easy. We are probably going to have to get Dr. Drew on this one you guys. Does he hypnotize people btw? Those of you who can seamlessly wade through water like sea angels, please consider yourself lucky! (F U)
ALRIGHTY MY SWEET DOVES! Let’s talk about bathing suits! I know it’s a bit sacrilegious to have Esther as the style icon without even showing off her own namesake designs, but I figured we should switch things up since I’ve been featuring her suits on here for the past few years, as well as own two of them myself. Interestingly enough, Fables and Barrie is on this list a lot! You may remember them as the creators of the wood panel pornsuit I blogged about earlier this year. You know…I actually kinda dig the two piece version of that woodboner suit!
I’m really into this Puttin’ on the Ritz tuxedo-style suit. Bernie Dexter is modeling two different styles from Fables by Barrie and What Katy Did. How cute are these? Would you wear a top hat in the pool? You know I would.
And of course, nautical is ALWAYS on the top of my list. Fables by Barrie did both of these suits and have tons of cute red and blue pieces that you can mix and match, so make sure you lurk their site thoroughly. My favorite combo on the left is SO Christina Aguilera “Candyman”-era which was the best Christina era, I think we can all agree.
AND HERE IS THE WINNER! The Ashley swimsuit by Fables and Barrie. We have not seen a suit like this before! Is it even a bathing suit? Because I want to do a lot of things while wearing it, LIKE:
- be a ring girl at a boxing match
- drop a scarf to signify the start of a drag race like Paula Abdul did with Keanu in “Rush, Rush” (or Natalie Wood in Rebel Without A Cause, whichever reference you prefer)
- Or lift weights like Coco!
So versatile! Have you guys found any other vintage style suits that you like?
June 24, 2011 9 Comments
The lovely Petra sent me these amazing pink and black tie-dye tights from her Pebelle line. Since interviewing Petra last year, we’ve kept in touch and she’s even started a blog for Pebelle! Take a look at it here. I love these tights! They take my tiger dress to a whole new level. I wore this ‘lil number when I met up with my sister from another mister, Mary Van Note, while she was in town last month performing some shows.
Working the boulevard with Mary and Emi. WACHOW
HOW CUTE DOES MARY LOOK IN MY HEART TART HAT?!
I can’t wait for Mary and Ben to come back to LA!! Serenading you guys Janet Jackson-style right now.
One of the shows that Mary performed at while in LA was called Mortified, where people read embarrassing excerpts from their old diaries. At the one we went to, one of the dudes read letters that he wrote to none other than Mr. Belvedere! The kid who played Wesley was also a special guest! My bro and I were huge fans of Mr. Bellybutton so that was a REAL TREAT. That above is Mary’s diary, which she read from after unlocking with a special key. Naturally the whole thing got me thinking about the old Dear Diary feature I had on here when I first started this blog. I have been meaning to start that up again, although my junior high-era Pochacco diary might be too embarrassing to share on here since it’s all about how boy crazy I was. With my luck, I would post an excerpt from it which is basically a logbook of obsessively-detailed crushes and the one boy who kicked my legs under my desk because “they were hairier than his” will most likely find it and send me a penus pic or something. WHICH, btw, is suuuch a 2007 move, Anthony Weiner (YOU AMATEUR)
It also got me thinking about one of my favorite games I like to play called “What Were Marie and Emi Doing At This Age?” where we basically compare the vast differences in our childhoods (i.e., me being raised Catholic versus she being raised atheist; me catching butterflies and playing Skip-It while she was hobknobbin’ with CHRISTIAN SLATER and chasing DURAN DURAN AROUND TOWN! TWEEN JEALOUSY STILL EXISTS FU EMI). This game also includes the comparison of our Sanrio diaries. When we first read some of the entries side by side, we were dead on the floor because it’s like “Yep, we are still pretty much the same as we were back then.”
My diary is the blue Hello Kitty one. (GOODY TWO SHOEZ) and hers is the Keroppi one below it.
June 23, 2011 10 Comments