Once upon a time, I would always go to this certain Chevron gas station to pick up weekend warrior essentials: string cheese, Smart Water, chicle, etc, and the same cholo cashier would always pay me compliments. BTW props to the latin mangs for having no qualms about giving compliments. Take from their cue dudes! Anyway, one particular evening, I got up to the register and the cholo cashier said, “DAAAMN GIRL. YOU SMELL LIKE CHRISTMAS!” If you know me well, you know I LOVES to smell like DESSERT. No patchouli stank or grandma musk for me, ladies and gents. I like to smell like something right outta the oven. Like a Cinnabun employee. Like a walking funnel cake. Like a gawtdamn bakery! I didn’t have the heart to tell him he was actually smelling my Secret Vanilla Chai deodorant. EVERYTHING DESSERT I TELL YOU. Even my armpits.


My girlfriends and I are always on the lookout for the “yummy smelly good stuff.” I think this started ten years ago when I would religiously use BODY SECRETS Cotton Candy Fantasy that you’d easily find at the local Thrifty’s. Since then, life has consisted of a constant search for the perfect candy-smelling scent. Sidenote: do you remember what perfumes you wore as a baby hoodrat? My fragrance timeline went like this: Love’s Baby Soft -> Exclamation! -> Sunflowers -> CK ONE. I also swear I had this Michael Jackson Moonwalker perfume that came with a star necklace but my Googles have turned up nothing! They did however, reveal this Michael Jackson California Raisin (which has been added to my Amazon wishlist FYI.)

There is this Calgon Marshmallow body spray drugstore delight that my friends and I love. It’s delicious and addicting, but since it’s just a body spray it doesn’t last long. A couple of years ago, Sephora sold a line of dessert-themed fragrances called Eau De Vie but they were discontinued. One of them was called Whipped Cream. I have about half an inch left in a bottle that Reyna gave me for Xmas in 2008 and can’t bring myself to throw it away! Why can’t it come back? Sadly I have not yet found perfumes that mirror these two favorites of mine so I’ve chosen to seek other alternatives. I have been doing this research for over a year! This is SERIOUS BUSINESS! I became a ghetto “nose” aka perfumer the past year smelling EVERYTHING I could get my schnozz on. Reyna told me that the legit “noses” in Paris are pure and do not drink, smoke or eat crazy things, but I don’t believe that one bit…French people are incapable of living such boring lives! Anyway, I wanted to share with you my favorite fragrances that came about during this journey.


1. First off, there is Tokyo Milk. They make yummy scents with names like “I Want Candy,” Let Them Eat Cake,” and my favorite, “Honey and the Moon.” Sweet honey, sugared violet and jasmine are in the fragrance notes of that one. Definitely one to try! You can get these at Beauty Habit.

2. You probably know this already but…Pink Sugar is the probably the #1 legit candy-scented perfume out there right now. It’s really popular at Sephora and deserves its fame because it is truly PERFECTION! But I honestly want more in my dessert smelling world! GIMME MORE MUM.

3. I HATE to admit it, but Kat Von D’s “Saint” might be my new favorite. Reyna gave me a sample of it and it is SUPA DELISHIS. Notes of plum, mandarin, and caramel really make it a yummy scent to wear all day everyday. It’s going to be my next purchase.

The lovely people at knew I was looking for sweet-smelling perfumes and sent me Marc Jacobs Lola, Viva La Juicy and Hanae Mori to try out.

4. If you haven’t tried Marc Jacobs Lola, it is LOVELY. Its notes include rose, vanilla and ruby red grapefruit giving it that “warm-sweet” fragrance I always go for. Definitely one of my current favorites. I’ve been wearing it everyday. And the bottle is badass!

5. Viva La Juicy is another one I tried and liked. It doesn’t come out as dessert-y as the notes suggest (wild berries , mandarin, caramel, vanilla, and praline) but it makes for a nice everyday choice as well.

6. Hanae Mori is a classic. This is one that’s been around since the early nineties and you can never go wrong with it. It has notes of grapefruit and strawberry. You know..I think grapefruit notes are what bring that warm-sweet kind of scent. I’ve noticed that common denominator in a lot of fragrances I like.

8. Mariah Carey just came out with a new perfume line called “Lollipop Bling which is the most hilarious name ever! I had to try it because MARIAH is “our” #1 guilty pleasure and with a name like LOLLIPOP BLING I assumed it was the scent I had been waiting for my whole life. HOWEVER, I’m disappointed in the packaging of this scent, Mariah. You are a circus of a woman and I expect the same level of absurdity in design as well. Instead we are given this mediocrity of a perfume bottle. GO BIG OR GO HOME. Anyway, there are three scents in this line. “Mine Again” has notes of chocolate, magnolia and raspberry, “Honey” has pineapple and honey and “Ribbon” is a blue raspberry scent. I wasn’t able to get samples of these to truly test out at home, but when I checked them out at Macy’s, “Honey” was my favorite so far. I think these are going to come out at RITE AID so we will all easily be able to smell like Nick Cannon’s sugar daddy. JUST KIDDING. I loved Drumline.

7. & 9. There are a couple I still want to try out like Laura Mercier’s Crème Brûlée (warm caramel, spun sugar, French vanilla beans) and Gale Hayman’s Delicious Cotton Candy (orange, bergamot, clementine, cotton candy.)

Even though I found some lovely perfumes to wear my heart still yearns for the ULTIMATE candy/dessert smelling scent. My dream is to someday have a fragrance line where I can create the perfect perfumes that will make cholos everywhere believe it’s Christmas when you walk into the room. I want people to crave birthday cake and donuts everytime I flip my weave. I believe this is a dream that I can achieve. It is only a matter of time!

How do you guys feel about dessert-scented fragrances? If you are OBSESSED like yours truly are there any perfumes I might have missed in my years of research? Lemme know! LUV EWE LOTS.