Valley girl manicurist Valerie, played by my favorite actress slash professional archer Geena Davis, discovers her doctor boyfriend cheating on her, but finds romance in her own backyard when an alien spaceship crashes into her swimming pool. Out come three extraterrestrial hunks played by Damon Wayans, Jim Carrey and my ultimate childhood crush (before Fred Savage and Mikey from The Goonies): Jeff Goldblum (THE FLY!!!!!)
They are completely covered in crayon-colored fur, but are still FINE AS FUCK, especially JG right here! Why am I so turned on?? Am I alone? (crickets..)
Geena Davis with her top ramen hairdo.
One of the best scenes is at the beauty salon, where Valerie’s BFF and sidekick Candy, played by the amazing Julie Brown (not the Downtown) helps Valerie sexify her look. Julie Brown is so awesome in this. Where are you Julie?
This is probably one of the first movies to pioneer the cinematic tradition and insta-gem that is a really good MAKEOVER MONTAGE SCENE. Synchronized dance and song are even better.
Candy also gives the alien hunks a good shave so they can pass as human. Wish I had that job. WUT
There are so many good details in the props and costume department for this movie. The phones! Quintessential 80’s lip phone, duck phone and even a GIANT phone for yours truly.
Give me these tights and shoes! Are those heart shoelace clips? Can we bring those back? I remember I used to have Minnie Mouse ones that attached to my L.A. Gears.
Gimme that heart bag Geena!
Another great scene is the appearance of Angelyne and her famous pink corvette. If you live in Southern California chances are you have seen her driving around.
And now…FASHION! This time I did a set focusing on monochromatic outfits inspired by each of the alien hunks. I love head-to-toe crazy color. With a ‘lil pizazz you can be a walking Crayola as well! Werk it gurl.
Zeebo:
Wiploc:
Mac:
One of my favorite things in the world is dreamy scenes of 80’s hunks.
When I have a Soft Focus Crush I imagine him glistening in the sun, doing sit-ups and jumping jacks while I lurk in the shadows watching his every move…
When Louise starts practicing some magic, ultimately becoming the ‘Most Popular Girl,’ she starts dressing for success. She gonna get her mang, she gonna get some fans, she gonna be the dom of the prom!!! People start keeping tabs on her every move…the tables have turned!
How about this little number for dancing in the halls?
Teen Witch 3 – by Agent Lover on Polyvore.com
Do you guys remember bolo ties? I wore one during the 90210 days of 1991. I think it’s because Brenda Walsh had one…unless I was secretly trying to dress like David Silver’s best friend who wanted to be a cowboy. Do not click that link!!! You will cry just like you did in the sixth grade.
If bolo ties ever make a comeback, I don’t know what I would do…except eat some BBQ. Why do bolo ties make me crave that?! Louise, if you please:
Teen Witch 1 – by Agent Lover on Polyvore.com
Everybody loves the infamous ‘Top That’ rap scene. A few years ago I memorized it so my friend Brant and I could battle. He’s so funky!
[wp_youtube]zQ00laVt62c[/wp_youtube]
Let’s talk about the real star of the show…little brother Richie. Forget Swayze Centaur, the ultimate random tattoo would be a picture of Richie in his bellboy uniform. IMAGINE?? I will get him on my upper arm. TEEN WITCH SLEEVE! MADAME SERENA ON THE FOREARM. Get it gurl.
My friends and I can still seriously spit his lines every day. Is this just funny to us or does anyone else love him too?
[wp_youtube]ahpOQL3zX4w[/wp_youtube]
At last, Louise makes it to prom in her indigo blue, shoulder pad delight. Everyone is like “Daaayum!”
Glorious, how I imagine my life is like in another dimension.
We will let Louise keep the blue, but ditch the maxipad shoulders for something more bewitching.
Teen Witch 2 – by Agent Lover on Polyvore.com
Her red hot lover Brad will be mesmerized…
Fun Fact: Robyn Lively who plays Louise, is the sister of Blake Lively aka Serena from GOSSIP GIRL. Wild! Also, YES. I’ve heard of the Teen Witch remake they are planning with the mean bitch from High School Musical. Um, FUCK THAT. I’m so pissed. I can’t even talk about it right now. Anyway! Stay tuned for my next installment in my 1980’s Movie Heroines series! Perhaps next time we will cover crimped hair and camel toe! In the meantime, here are some other articles you might want to peep:
+ That Chick Julie, She’s Truly Dazzling
+ Getaway Girl Style – Bonnie and Clyde
+ Getaway Girl Style – Pierrot Le Fou
+ Getaway Girl Style – The Doom Generation
xo,
Marie
I remember when I was ten or eleven, I attended confession and spilled my grade school sins to the priest, which were apparently so lacking in quantity it prompted him to keep asking me, eyebrow-raised, “Is that all, Marie? Are you SURE that’s it?” Either I was just an innocent good girl (true), or he was peering inside a portal of time, looking at a long list of sins that would be committed by my future self.
In Don’t Deliver Us From Evil
Ever since watching it, then shortly after stumbling across the band I’m insane about, Fan Death , who seem to be inspired by the movie as well, I have been obsessed with the idea of satanic schoolgirls. All I wanna do is wear knee highs and worship the devil, OK?! The film is inspired by the story of the real-life Heavenly Creatures murderesses, Pauline Parker and Juliet Hammond. Satan’s young scholars read Baudelaire in bed, torture small creatures and tease men mercilessly for kicks. Doesn’t that sound fun? Let’s dress like them!
Very important to know: Red lipstick is the devil’s rouge…
A delicate, First Communion type-of-dress with a flower headband crown is the perfect inappropriate Catholic schoolgirl look. These Minna Parikka Raquel heels, which are on sale at Tatty Devine, are hot business. If you pair them up with knee highs, it would be a match made in heaven (or HELL for that matter.) If you need to stock up on knee highs, Target has a good variety of them right now under the Xhilaration brand.
I just had one of those discoveries where you find out you are subconsciously obsessed with something and for me it’s always been birds. Our pretty, musical feathered friends.. both alive and dead. You can add some foul fowl to your look with this same headband I have from Forever 21 and a Fauna Spotted Bird Necklace from my lovely friend, Paraphernalia, (who I interviewed here if you missed it!)
Here are a couple of my own interpretations of the sinister schoolgirl look!
Vintage blue plaid dress – ebay
Black heart purse – H&M
Eye of the Beholder pendant – Cloven Hoof
Black knee socks – Target
black mary jane heels – local store
This next outfit I wore to my gal Dizzy Von Damn’s birthday party at Medusa Lounge. Everyone was looking for my cleavage that night but I decided to go stag.
Tuxedo top – H&M
Black skirt- H&M
belt – local shop
Betsey Johnson Lock It Up purse
Eye of the Beholder pendant – Cloven Hoof
Jeffrey Campbell Evade shoes! – Solestruck.com! They were nice enough to send me some free shoesies and I chose these ones. I LOVE them. Danielle from Solestruck was very sweet and a pleasure to correspond with! Thank you very much!!
Black Feathered Crow Headband – Mary Tofts! I love this striped birdy headband from Mary Tofts on Etsy. Remember when I made a feathered headpiece for Lenora Claire’s Houdini Mansion birthday party? This one is lovely because it’s simple yet striking enough to wear on other occasions besides extravagant Hollywood shindigs. Here’s a close up of it in this picture of Shaun and I.
Check out Mary Tofts Etsy store for even more lovely handmade curiosities. Also, If you don’t know who Mary Tofts is, please Google! It is a very WILD story!
I leave you with a couple of Fan Death songs to start off your sinful weekend.
Fan Death – Veronica’s Veil
and this crazy ass amazing mix of Fan Death’s “When the Money’s Right” with Hercules and Love Affair’s “Blind” by Immuzikation that I am addicted to today!!!
Immuzikation – Blind Death
Remember, it’s always nice to have a best friend….
I was recently recommended the 1966 Czech film Sedmikrásky or Daisies, by a lovely lady and what a fantastic recommendation it was! Vera Chytilová’s famously banned film is about two sisters who one day decide that since the world is bad, they should become bad too. They engage in a number of conscience-free high jinks ranging from fake dinner dates with sugar daddies to setting their apartment on fire. There is plenty of food gluttony in this film. Those bitches are HONGRY! Visually stunning and fucking weird as fuck are two of my favorite ingredients for foreign cinema. On top of that I felt like I was on drugs! This was one of those films I couldn’t stop screencapping because every scene looked like celluloid dessert, so allow me to now force feed your eyes. Open wide!
Since we always gotta talk about FASHIONZ up in here, I just have to say that the girls looked cute in every scene. 1966 will of course bring some cute dresses. This movie makes me want to wear a daisy crown.
Naturally by the end of the film I was left trying to analyze everything: the girls being portrayed as robotic dolls in the beginning, their constant fixation with scissors and cutting things paperdoll-style throughout the film, the basic theme of female rebellion and then up until the very end when they are outfitted in pieces of paper [what does that symbolize?!] during their attempt to clean up the destruction of the dining hall, a scene which was voiced-over by some spooky OCD-type whispering, followed by their meeting with fate. However, the lack of plot and character exploration along with the faux-high feeling it produced just made me do an F U middle-finger-80’s style at the television and just sit back and enjoy the imagery. The end scene in the banquet hall also reminded me of something that would happen IN OUR COMIC BOOK WORLD by the way.
Anybody else loved this movie as much as I did? How are Vera Chytilová’s other films? Anything as good as Daisies to recommend to your dear friend Miss Marie?
]]>