Category — Obsess With Me

Ever since my friend Mrs. Trouble posted about these Jeffrey Campbell gold unicorn heels, I can’t stop thinking about them. I feel like the crazy little girl in The Red Shoes, dreaming about them morning, noon, and night. They remind me of the shoes my god Bjork wore to the Venice Film Festival in 2005 but 10 x better. Anyone know who designed these btw?

Let me just show you my friends, with the risk of scaring you, how this obsession is now revealing itself in some photoshop shoe art…(please don’t be scurred or ple dew actually…)

Dear Shoe Gawds,

Please help me find these magnificent creatures in an 8.5, or actually two 8.5s and one 9 and I will forever be yours.

PS. Mod Cloth has them in beige but you know how I LOVE ME GOLD!

I love me some tacos. Soft shell, hard shell, from a truck, costs a buck. I’ll try any taco anytime (no euphemisms today, my friends). My favorite is machaca aka shredded beef in a crunchy shell and El Coyote is my long-standing favorite for that. I also have a strong affinity for a good potato taco. My best friend makes the best potato tacos in the world, but I have yet to find a really good potato taco in LA. Any tips?*

BFF potato tacos with my homemade guacamole

Would you try a taco with an adventurous filling? I’ve tried ostrich but I won’t eat any lengua though.  That is too kinky VOM for me. I don’t want to eat anything used for frenchin’. I judge mexican restaurants on their salsa and their tacos. It’s serious business. During the tipsy after hours, I’ll take a Jack in the Box taco (2 for 99 cents) a Del Taco taco (lovin’ that pico de gallo bo) or even a Taco Bell Taco IF I HAVE TO. (Seen above). I’m at about 65 for the taco tally. Who wants to buy me my 69th taco this year? After that I ain’t gonna tally no more.

Taco cosmetics purse from Fred Flare

The next addition to our food costume collection? Watchu think?

*Taco tips can be sent to marie[at]agentlover.com

For the past couple of months I’ve become obsessed with gold bangles. And by obsessed I mean wearing FULL GOLD STACKS. My style icon Kimora and I have been scouring up and down and all around for the best bangle for your buck. Surprisingly, the mall has been my best bet. Charlotte Russe hooked up 18 bracelets for $7. Claire’s and Baker’s have yielded good bargains as well. I haven’t worn this many bracelets on my arm since my P.L.U.R. days, my friend. I’ve personally stacked just under 100 simultaneously. Yes, I said 100. Girls with skinny arms, you can easily stack more. My #1 complaint about going this crazy is that the stacks smell like a dirty coin purse (NPI). I’m currently working on that antidote for us.

Be careful what you do when you’re stacked btw. If you have a hot date that night, a jingle-jangle hj might be a little off-putting for your mang. (“This handjob sounds like grandmother’s windchimes!” SICK)

I have been consumed.

By TWILIGHT. Back when I was a teen I was really into L.J. Smith’s The Vampire Diaries and The Secret Circle, and as you know, my particular childhood obsessions with vampires and monsters, so I am not surprised I would be into this vampire ROMANCE series. Sadly, all my free time this past week has gone to Edward Cullen. Back to our regular scheduled blogging shortly, as I am refraining from buying Eclipse to hinder this nonstop reading for a bit. Leyla, you are to blame for this, thanks.

27 going on 13,

Marie

Dear Lost,

I fucking hate you. You make me want to tear out my hair and glue it to my face you are so goddamn good. When I watch you I get so worked up and want to scream to the high heavens. I know I am an asshole and missed a whole season and a half of you but I promise to stay in, Netflix that shit, grow a beard and not come out until I am all caught up, although I know I will probably be even more confused than before. I even had to apply some vanilla deodorant before I watched you in case I started to sweat from all the tension. Thank goodness Make Me a Supermodel comes on right afterwards so I can relax while watching that hottie Perry scratch his balls on national television. I hope he wins. Yes Perry, I voted for you. Come to mama.

Your pal,
Marie

1. Lifetime – In high school I was really obsessed with Lifetime Original Movies. They are trashy romance novels come to life. I still have conversations with kindred spirits about “the one where Kellie Martin was all obsessed with Tori Spelling and started wearing her cheerleader jacket” and “the one where Fred Savage beat up Candace Cameron”. Unfortunately the obsession seems to have come back to me with a vengeance. I watched Alyssa Milano in Wisegal, which wasn’t too shameful because I can make the excuse it was mobster movie, well one with Samantha from Who’s the Boss, but still. Then I watched some movie called Abducted, only because there was a poor man’s Michael Vartan in it. What happened to Michael Vartan anyway?

2. Cheap Italian Champagne – I have become addicted to this eight-dollar bubbly called Ballatore Spumante. We are averaging two bottles a week lately. And there is no specific reason for this cork-popping indulgence! “Atonement made us depressed, let’s get some champagna!” “Penelope made us happy, let’s get some champagna!” “I cut my bangs, let’s get some champagna!” “It’s Daylight Savings Time, let’s get some freakin’ champagna!” Baby, we don’t need a reason to celebrate other than LIFE!

3. Period Films - Pride and Prejudice, The Other Boleyn Girl, Girl with the Pearl Earring, Elizabeth, The Duchess out later this year…period pieces turn up the horn with sexy British leads and satisfy my love for elaborate costume. Needless to say my Netflix queue has been burning up. Also: Collin Firth.

4. The 99 Cent Store – HA!!! What’s the Starbucks/99 Cent Store ratio in Southern California? ‘Cause both of them are everywhere, which makes it easy for me to get an iced coffee and a Venus Flytrap with just a drive down the street. Yes, I said a Venus Flytrap from the goddamn 99! And yes, my plant is still alive after a month. It is straight Little Shop of Horrors up in here. Anyway, where else can you get cute red and white baroque mini storage boxes, the perfect fake eyelashes, and fresh sunflowers?!? The heaven-sent 99, that’s where.

5. America’s Best Dance Crew – Okay, I will admit without shame that I go bananas for almost anything dance-related, but particularly hip-hop. Even though I have been through semi-gawth and hardcore raver phases throughout my life and listen to whiny indie pussy music, my heart always reverts to hip-hop. I used to dance back in the day, [Filipinos know how to fucking bust a move], and watching things like Step Up [BLOL] and America’s Best Dance Crew makes my guts sigh. I bet when I am an old grandmama I will be rocking in my chair with my granddaughter on my lap watching old Missy Elliott videos and saying “Your grams used to pop-n-lock, little girl!!!” Anyway, I LOVE this show. Thank you Randy Jackson for bringing me Fysh N’ Chips [Wah, eliminated] and those hot masked b-boys JabbaWockeez!

6. People Whose Faces Look Like Kraft American Cheese – Lastly, I’m just really into saying shit like “So and So’s face looks like a slice of American Cheese.” Did I get that somewhere or is that an original Marie-ism? I can’t tell. But as some of you know, I HATE American Cheese. VOM.

What stupid embarrassing obsessions are you into right now? And no, Lost does not count because Lost is a very classy obsession.