90′s Style Icons: Death Becomes Her

WELL. ::exhales:: The time has come to talk about our absolute favorite (and only??) Meryl Streep and Goldie Hawn movie…Death Becomes Her! Meryl and Goldie play two bitter rivals who will stop at NOTHING and I mean NOTHING to one up the other!

First we meet Madeline (Meryl) who is a real DIVA of an actress starring in a shitty Broadway musical. Her longtime frenemy Helen, an aspiring writer, comes to one of her performances bringing her plastic surgeon fiancé Ernest (played by another one of my FOREVER HUNKS, Los BRUCIE WILLIS!) along with her. This was a HUGE mistake because once the words plastic and surgeon touched the incredibly vain and beauty-obsessed Madeline’s eardrums, she turned her HORN SIREN on up to full blast, eventually seducing Ernest, causing him to leave Helen and marry Madeline.

Many years later, we find out that this betrayal had turned Helen into an unhealthy, depressed and very obsessed CUCKOOLICIOUS who is committed to a psychiatric hospital. She fakes her way out by pretending to be cured but secretly vows to get her revenge on Madeline.

More years pass and we see that Madeline is still obsessed with looking GORGE N’ YOUNG, and Ernest is an alcoholic mortician. During one of her regular spa visits, she is given a mysterious business card of a woman who specializes in youth rejuvenation. Afterwards, she hears that her old pal Helen has become a successful writer and goes to her book party.

Surprisingly, Helen is looking like a lil’ hottie and Madeline is clearly SHOCKED AND JEALOUS.

She ends up visiting the woman whose name is on the business card she received at the spa…and THIS is where we meet the elusive Lisle Von Rhoman played by the most beautiful ISABELLA ROSELLINI!!!!

I LOVE HER SO MUCH

Lisle promises eternal youth to Madeline with her magic potion which is kept in a fancy Fabergé egg…

Madeline is like PLE RIGHT AWAY ::magic boobs scene::

Meanwhile, Helen is plotting to steal back Ernest and kill Madeline! Let’s talk about my favorite shot right here. Goldie Hawn, hair and makeup perfect, talking on the phone in front of an candle-lit altar wearing a Nike “Just Do It” shirt.

Always gots 2 give props to a spywear-type of outfit, complete with black beret, leather jacket and cateye shades.

She’s even chic as fuck with a rope around her!

Things start to go crazy as the two ladies fight, literally, to the death over los Ernesto! Either he must have been RULL GOOD in the sack or these ladies don’t give a shit about anything except beating the other at everything! (Most likely the latter.)

It becomes obvious that both of them paid a visit to the fountain of youth! These betches are OBV not taking care of their youthful bods. Lisle is going to be SO PISSED!

What a great duo Meryl and Goldie were. I could have watched a whole sequel about their two decapitated heads still arguing while rolling down stairs. Why couldn’t we get any more movies starring the two of them? Some Thelma and Louise-type of adventures? As we know, Meryl is still doing rull well. These days, Goldie is totally zen and doing good thangs in the world, but I’m still going to hope and pray for a reunion movie with the two of them someday!

18 comments

1 Bren { 03.02.12 at 2:07 pm }

I don’t think you can see it in any of these photes, but Isabella Rosselini was rocking a FIERCE manicure with this character. It was like a reverse moon mani – the ORIGINAL.

2 marie { 03.02.12 at 2:08 pm }

ARE YOU SERIOUS?? I usually screencap ALL NAIL shots. I will have to look again! Sounds amazing!

3 Mary { 03.02.12 at 2:54 pm }

fantastic, I luv, luv, luv this movie!

4 Ben { 03.02.12 at 3:12 pm }

This was on TV in the UK about a week ago, sooooo good.

5 Anna Nio { 03.02.12 at 3:32 pm }

YES! I absolutely love this flick, and feel like I’m way too often haggering people to watch it or re-watch it (cause they’ve obviously not understood it’s magnificent greatness yet).

And since you seem as obsessive and detail-oriented as myself: how about the wonderful, subtle bitchery our laydeez produce in calling each other Mad and Hel whenever they meet? LOVE IT! “‘Madeline Ashton goes to the opening of an envelope.’ Oh, those people can be so cruel! I fired her. Well, I almost fired her.” <3<3<3

6 Danielle { 03.02.12 at 4:11 pm }

I watched this movie SO MUCH as a kid, and I still love it. I think it was the first Bruce Willis movie I ever watched (or Look Who’s Talking? haha) so he is forever Ernest to me, no matter what he does. Anyway, Isabella Rosselini is amaaaaazing, and I do remember that super gorgeous manicure Bren mentioned… I think she also had a really long, sharp pinkie nail if I remember correctly? Anyway, yay for this post!

7 vanessa { 03.02.12 at 5:24 pm }

So weird, I was just talking about this movie the other day! Whenever I imagine myself getting into some sort of hijinks, I picture Goldie’s beatnik cat burglar outfit.

8 Zombie { 03.03.12 at 8:43 am }

This movie is so awesome! They don’t do movies like in the 90′s anymore, which is bad. Like …Wiches of Eastwick, that one is also awesome :)

9 Dani { 03.03.12 at 12:53 pm }

i swear you are like my sister from another mister!

10 Michelle { 03.03.12 at 1:16 pm }

Sometimes I think you are inside my mind! I was just having an in depth conversation about the scene where Goldie is surrounded by frosting cans and cats. Love this movie!

I think I remember that manicure too…like triangles on the moon part with a SUPER LONG coke nail? We need screencaps!

11 Em { 03.03.12 at 10:00 pm }

WOAHH I forgot this movie existed! It’s sooo good! Def gonna download this week!

12 Eli { 03.04.12 at 8:04 pm }

Embarrased to say I havent seen Death Becomes Her yet!! Gonna look for it stat!

Also, have you seen these videos Isabella R. has been making called Green Porno? They’re on youtube AMAZING

13 Liz { 03.06.12 at 11:41 am }

I saw this movie on a plane as a kid and thought it was basically the best movie ever made. Watched it again a couple years ago and was shocked to discover that IT HOLDS UP. Death Becomes Her is still awsome and completely amazing(and the special effects really don’t look that bad). I love everything about it.

14 maryvannote { 03.07.12 at 9:41 am }

I can’t believe I haven’t seen this movie yet. It looks awesome!!! You’re right, that Just Do It frame is perfection!

15 alexa { 03.09.12 at 4:03 am }

Gosh this was my favourite film back then. Bruce Willis looked so cute in it. Ohhh those 90s… :)

16 Amy { 03.12.12 at 9:34 am }

Holy crap! I loved this movie as a girl. Thanks for this post, truly made me smile.

17 Marie (not the writer) { 03.18.12 at 1:33 am }

Glad I’m not the only one that noticed the coke nail – surely you can cut it for a movie?

18 TheShoeGirl { 04.11.12 at 12:56 am }

We were meant for each other.

Leave a Comment