Sixteen Reasons Why I Might Be Your Dream Girl

ooh shiny

Photo by Robyn Von Swank.

I have never done one of these tagged posts before but I am taking a cue from the lovely Gina Marr and presenting you with sixteen fun facts about yours truly.

+ I have severe Wanderlust and always want to escape to far-off places. I always say it’s due to a case of the gypsy flu. I’ve been to Beijing, London, Amsterdam, the Bahamas, New York and love running off to San Francisco and Vegas any chance I get. I really want to go to Paris, Italy, Tokyo and GREECE (so I can be all disco dewy like in Mamma Mia!)

+ I was extremely shy and one of those smart kids growing up but also kind of an asshole because I wouldn’t give the class nerds Valentine’s Day cards! For some reason I keep thinking about that lately and feel very guilty. I’m so sorry, nerds. :(

+ I was also really boy crazy back then too. I had a crush on Fred Savage and once wrote him a four page fan letter in yellow highliter. I was also enamored with Bastian and Atreyu and fantasized I was an indian princess in The Neverending Story named “Chrysanthemum.” ( I know you are so jealous.)

+ I totally spelled Chrysanthemum correctly right then because I am a spelling nazi. This is because of my favorite toy, the Speak & Spell. Sadly, I feel as though my internet usage these past five years has made me really dumb and lazy.

+ When I drink too much whiskey, I sometimes recite Catholic mass, including the priest’s part. GAH! I also like to rap old TLC.

+ I wanted to be a writer for Jane magazine and once applied as an intern (which I did not get.) I miss that magazine. RIP Jane magazine.

+ I’m Filipino and Italian. Growing up was tough because I didn’t know anyone else like me. YOU FEEL ALL ALONE AS A HALFBREED. OH CHER. I still absolutely hate it when you can only choose one box for your ethnicity.

+ I’ve tested out almost every type of clothing style and hairdo. Raver, semi-goth, MY PENNY HARDAWAY FROM ORLANDO MAGIC JERSEY WTF?!, grampa plaid pants and little boy’s thrift store tees, etc. Ironically my current style is the same as when I was five. ELLO KNEE SOCKS, DRESSES AND BANGS.

+ The people I choose to spend most of my time with are fuck.ing. amaz.ing. I’m in love love love love love with my friends. I hope I can find someone as sweet and hilarious and sexy as them that I can also bone. WHAT.

+ I love singing old jazz and plan to retire at 65 as a leathery tan and blonde lounge singer at the Mandalay Bay Hotel and Casino in beautiful Las Vegas crooning old Doris Day and Peggy Lee. I will see you there and be wearing a gold camel toe. OMG I will host The Gold Camel Toe Awards ceremony. (WTF? Sounds catchy though, no?)

+ The reason I am the way I am is because of Oona Goosepimple and Mae West. If you understand what this means about me without a GOOG I will french you.

+ I’m really into the supernatural and aliens and the occult. I like WEIRD SHIT. I grew up on alien books and Coast to Coast AM.

+ My favorite place in the world is the Madonna Inn. When we first went into the Love Nest room I told my friends, “This is what I feel my insides look like.” My second favorite place in the world is the Haunted Mansion at Disneyland. Sigh.

+ Bjork. That’s all you need to know. It’s too personal to talk about here.

+ My favorite book is Story of the Eye. My favorite poem is “She Walks in Beauty” by Lord Byron. I am obsessed with Hans Christian Andersen’s The Red Shoes. I am STILL in the middle of the third Twilight book. Since…August. Everyone hates me.

+ I’m a huge romantic in every single way. I am always dreaming. It gets me into a lot of trouble but I wouldn’t have it any other way. This is most likely why I’m bad at math.

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0 comments

1 Mickay { 01.07.09 at 12:15 am }

i love you.

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2 marie { 01.07.09 at 12:21 am }

I love you more than all the stars in the sky and the monsters in the ocean.

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3 Ali-bell { 01.07.09 at 12:27 am }

Mamma Mia made me want to go to Greece too… as long as I can wear pretty clothes and dance around an island singing the whole time!

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4 the slackmistress { 01.07.09 at 12:41 am }

OMG OONA GOOSEPIMPLE. I have not thought about her in years. YEARS.

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5 loulou { 01.07.09 at 1:23 am }

You ARE totally my dream girl. Lets resume emailing for 2000 and DIVINE x

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6 gina marr { 01.07.09 at 6:59 am }

this is why i picked you! i don’t even know where to begin. haha bjork! nuff said … story of the eye (fuck yes), penny hardaway orlando magic jersey! you are such a slice of heaven. thanks for sharing!!!

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7 Poochie { 01.07.09 at 7:13 am }

The Haunted Mansion at Walt Disney World is better, I think. I love The Red Shoes too… the evil wicked versions, of course!

Let’s run away to Paris and visit that catacombs!

Luv
Poochie

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8 Poochie { 01.07.09 at 7:13 am }

Damn!

THE catacombs.

Geez!

Luv
Poochie

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9 Fay Grimm { 01.07.09 at 9:28 am }

The Haunted Mansion!

Well, I am quite certain that I have a crush on you now.

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10 Mace Elaine { 01.07.09 at 9:29 am }

Hearts hearts hearts.
Also, I cannot stop laughing about the description of the Cher video:

Cher singing her classic hit Half Breed. Cher in an Indian headdress atop a horse.

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11 gabuchan { 01.07.09 at 9:59 am }

You are my dream girl!

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12 Tanya { 01.07.09 at 10:18 am }

You had me at “HELLO”

Let’s elope.

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13 Kelly { 01.07.09 at 10:43 am }

AHHH! My plans exactly. Can I come retire with you? We could be strange old leathery jazz crooners together :)

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14 Freya { 01.07.09 at 2:09 pm }

I would be proud to be your award-holding-old-lady at the Gold Camel Toe Awards.

And God I miss Jane Magazine too, although it started to get really bad under whatsherfuckneweditor.

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15 Shaun { 01.07.09 at 3:57 pm }

You are amazing.

And never forget – NEVER FORGET that you L-O-V-E Selena!!!

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16 catherine { 01.07.09 at 5:29 pm }

I’m a mix too so I can totally relate. Maybe since Obama is going to be president, this will be the year(s) of the mutt – here’s hoping!

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17 Kristin { 01.07.09 at 6:28 pm }

LOVE. and who doesn’t know who mae west is? you gun slinging, red lipped hot betty!

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18 marie { 01.09.09 at 9:37 am }

@ali-bell – I know!! I don’t care if that movie was cheesy, I LOVED IT! Everyone was all sweaty and singing. OH GREECE SOMEDAY!

@the slackmistress – YAH!! You feel me? Did we have this conversation before??

@loulou- I LOVE U!! I know, I’m what two months behind like the biggest a-hole ever?! I swear I have like three things bookmarked that need to go on my old ass email draft for you! 2009 EMAILING DIVINE!

@ginamarr – I know you understand the Bjork thang! OMG..Penny Hardaway… I will have to post a pic of me in my Magic gear. hehe

@Poochie – Ahhhh I bet! I have never been to Disney World!! mmm FRANCE! Macarons and high fa$hion! OH GOD don’t get me started on how badly I want to see the catacombs!!

@Mace – Maceypoo! HAHAHA fuck yes. I love that video. I also really want a headdress.

@gabuchan – aww <3

@Tanya – aw lady! Sorry I looked like a hungover wack ass mess when we ran into each other! Next time you see me I’ll be done up and in a wedding veil with a plane ticket to Vegas.

@Kelly – hellz yez. Don’t forget to bring your sequined jumpsuit!

@Freya -YAH.. i KNOW. I used to read it cover to cover and noticed once that happened I would only skim through.

@Shaun – SELENAS FOREVER

@catherine – Ooh what’s your mix? I’ll peep your blawg. GO TEAM MUTT!

@Kristin – TRUF!! That pertains more to Oona Goosepimple anyway!

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19 Em { 01.10.09 at 8:32 pm }

I’ll dreamgirl your ass to, fo sho!

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20 birdie { 01.12.09 at 3:05 pm }

Hell yeah @ Mae West.

“If you don’t like my peaches, why do you shake my tree?”

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21 Christina { 01.18.09 at 9:55 am }

I think everyone should rap to some old TLC! You know you want to :)

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22 Unbridled { 06.03.09 at 6:39 pm }

Strange how that happens…..but I “GET WHY”….What I mean is that, I was searching for “lovely soft sheets and duvet cover” …HaHa…Did you ever think that this would resemble you??? Perhaps…(after reading your great words) it describes you, and I have NO idea who you are, but I like to live rather “symbolically”….and am facinated by what life offers. Anyway, back to the point…Uhmmm…wait..was there one? I loved reading your site, and will probably be alright with my sheets and duvet that I currently own! From, your friend,…after all…./Melis

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